Saw the above cartoon and thought, "Nailed it!", so I had to share.
It has been a bit since my last post and quite a bit has happened. Week two of the diet went great - I ate right, exercised, drank my water, and was feeling fantastic - until the Friday of that week. On Friday, I woke up feeling famished. I stuck to the diet until dinner (despite my stomach growling all day and me feeling kind of weak) and finally broke down and begged a friend to go to dinner with me. I should have used some restraint, but I did not. I ate every last bite of my taco dinner (seriously, nothing was left) and drank a coke to make it even worse. I felt awful afterward. Not a guilty awful, but a 'I ate so much I may now physically explode' kind of awful. The next morning, I fully intended to go back to the diet and stick with it and all night my stomach was NOT happy with my over indulging.
Saturday morning, I still felt stuffed from the night before and couldn't even force myself to eat anything. By mid-afternoon, I had not eaten anything and was trying to force the shake down my throat (and water, which I didn't have a desire for either). Then I listened to a voice mail from my dad (he likes to call super early on weekends, so I didn't think anything of him leaving me a message and was in no rush to get to it) - a message telling me my Uncle Frankie (a long time family friend that I grew up seeing every weekend) had passed away on Thursday and that the wake was going to be on Memorial Day. Being that my father lives in Georgia, he knew he would not be able to make it to the services, but he wanted to make me aware of them so I could pay my respects. It had been 20 years since I had seen Uncle Frankie or any of his family (or anyone from the old group, to be honest) and I was a little surprised by how hard learning of his death hit me. I suddenly felt horrible for losing touch with them, I felt awful for my Uncle Mario (my actual uncle, godfather, and Uncle Frankie's best friend), and I kind of just sunk at that point. I blankly turned to food for comfort - I can't even tell you what I ate or how much, it was just a familiar habit that helped to numb the pain.
Sunday morning wasn't much better, but I knew I needed to perk myself up because hubby and I had a wedding to attend that afternoon for an amazing couple. We went through the motions of the day - talking to my parents, spending time being ignored by our kids (Grandma and Gak were over, so we were basically invisible), getting a mani/pedi, etc. Finally, we headed out to the wedding and I was determined to enjoy myself (because the bride and groom worked hard to make it a beautiful event). The ceremony was perfect, the setting was beautiful, and the weather was gorgeous! Hubby and I headed in to grab drinks and the entire reception was spent kind of in a numb daze - I knew I was eating/drinking/socializing, but I wasn't all there. We contemplated going to an after party we were invited to, but I had a wake to go to in the city the next day and I really wasn't much in the mood to party.
Monday - by now, the diet wasn't even registering on my radar. The whole day/night was spent with getting ready for/driving to/attending/driving home from the wake - and eating. We had contemplated going to a movie after I got back home, but it was too late, and again, I wasn't in the mood. Hubby and I agreed that night that the diet was going to be on hold for a bit - the Avon Walk was coming up (where I would have no control over my food choices), I was depressed, and I had no desire to even try to stick it out at that time.
SO, that was that.
It has been a bit since my last post and quite a bit has happened. Week two of the diet went great - I ate right, exercised, drank my water, and was feeling fantastic - until the Friday of that week. On Friday, I woke up feeling famished. I stuck to the diet until dinner (despite my stomach growling all day and me feeling kind of weak) and finally broke down and begged a friend to go to dinner with me. I should have used some restraint, but I did not. I ate every last bite of my taco dinner (seriously, nothing was left) and drank a coke to make it even worse. I felt awful afterward. Not a guilty awful, but a 'I ate so much I may now physically explode' kind of awful. The next morning, I fully intended to go back to the diet and stick with it and all night my stomach was NOT happy with my over indulging.
Saturday morning, I still felt stuffed from the night before and couldn't even force myself to eat anything. By mid-afternoon, I had not eaten anything and was trying to force the shake down my throat (and water, which I didn't have a desire for either). Then I listened to a voice mail from my dad (he likes to call super early on weekends, so I didn't think anything of him leaving me a message and was in no rush to get to it) - a message telling me my Uncle Frankie (a long time family friend that I grew up seeing every weekend) had passed away on Thursday and that the wake was going to be on Memorial Day. Being that my father lives in Georgia, he knew he would not be able to make it to the services, but he wanted to make me aware of them so I could pay my respects. It had been 20 years since I had seen Uncle Frankie or any of his family (or anyone from the old group, to be honest) and I was a little surprised by how hard learning of his death hit me. I suddenly felt horrible for losing touch with them, I felt awful for my Uncle Mario (my actual uncle, godfather, and Uncle Frankie's best friend), and I kind of just sunk at that point. I blankly turned to food for comfort - I can't even tell you what I ate or how much, it was just a familiar habit that helped to numb the pain.
Sunday morning wasn't much better, but I knew I needed to perk myself up because hubby and I had a wedding to attend that afternoon for an amazing couple. We went through the motions of the day - talking to my parents, spending time being ignored by our kids (Grandma and Gak were over, so we were basically invisible), getting a mani/pedi, etc. Finally, we headed out to the wedding and I was determined to enjoy myself (because the bride and groom worked hard to make it a beautiful event). The ceremony was perfect, the setting was beautiful, and the weather was gorgeous! Hubby and I headed in to grab drinks and the entire reception was spent kind of in a numb daze - I knew I was eating/drinking/socializing, but I wasn't all there. We contemplated going to an after party we were invited to, but I had a wake to go to in the city the next day and I really wasn't much in the mood to party.
Monday - by now, the diet wasn't even registering on my radar. The whole day/night was spent with getting ready for/driving to/attending/driving home from the wake - and eating. We had contemplated going to a movie after I got back home, but it was too late, and again, I wasn't in the mood. Hubby and I agreed that night that the diet was going to be on hold for a bit - the Avon Walk was coming up (where I would have no control over my food choices), I was depressed, and I had no desire to even try to stick it out at that time.
SO, that was that.
Saturday, May 31st, was the beginning of my fourth Avon Walk for Breast Cancer! The past two years I have walked as part of a small team, Barbie's Rack Attack, but this year the team disbanded after I had already registered for the walk. As always, several people told me early on that they wanted to participate this year, but in the end it was just me. So, I joined the Solo Strutters, a team designed for solo walkers to guarantee you always have someone to walk with/eat with/tent with/etc during the event. I can NOT say enough good things about this group! Leslie, the Chicago team captain, was very welcoming from day one - and this year I had the best experience I have ever had during an Avon Walk event!
The Walk was amazing! This was by far the best Avon Walk experience I have ever had - I met incredible people (I do every year), made some new friends, and enjoyed every minute of the weekend. Hubby and the kids even made it down to the finish line on day two and made me some adorable signs (seeing the kids was the best part, though). I had decided last year that this was going to be my last Avon Walk for a few years, because of the fundraising/time/financial obligations of doing the event, so I was thrilled after spending time with the national captain for the Solo Strutters to listen to reasons why I shouldn't take time off. I decided that I still won't be walking next year, but I AM already registered to be a crew member.
Since the Avon Walk ended, lots of life got in the way (typical stuff, it happens) and hubby and I did not make our diet a priority. Today is a new day, however, and we started the 'cleanse' phase over as of this morning. We have decided to do a few things a little differently on this attempt, though. First off, we will still be exercising - it made me crazy to do nothing for a whole week and I have come too far to sit like a lump for a week. Second, we will not completely deprive ourselves of things. We do intend to give the entire 8 week challenge our best try, but if one of us caves and eats a piece of chocolate (me) or something bread-like (him), we will just accept that it happened and move on from there. I think I will be fine being chocolate free for at least the first few weeks since I just did the Chocolate Walking Tour with my mom and sisters yesterday (our Mother's Day outing, just a little late) and now have zero desire for anything chocolate.
The Walk was amazing! This was by far the best Avon Walk experience I have ever had - I met incredible people (I do every year), made some new friends, and enjoyed every minute of the weekend. Hubby and the kids even made it down to the finish line on day two and made me some adorable signs (seeing the kids was the best part, though). I had decided last year that this was going to be my last Avon Walk for a few years, because of the fundraising/time/financial obligations of doing the event, so I was thrilled after spending time with the national captain for the Solo Strutters to listen to reasons why I shouldn't take time off. I decided that I still won't be walking next year, but I AM already registered to be a crew member.
Since the Avon Walk ended, lots of life got in the way (typical stuff, it happens) and hubby and I did not make our diet a priority. Today is a new day, however, and we started the 'cleanse' phase over as of this morning. We have decided to do a few things a little differently on this attempt, though. First off, we will still be exercising - it made me crazy to do nothing for a whole week and I have come too far to sit like a lump for a week. Second, we will not completely deprive ourselves of things. We do intend to give the entire 8 week challenge our best try, but if one of us caves and eats a piece of chocolate (me) or something bread-like (him), we will just accept that it happened and move on from there. I think I will be fine being chocolate free for at least the first few weeks since I just did the Chocolate Walking Tour with my mom and sisters yesterday (our Mother's Day outing, just a little late) and now have zero desire for anything chocolate.
Despite going back to our old habits (eating out, fast food, pop, etc) AND over indulging the entire past week (we were celebrating our 5 yr anniversary and we ate a LOT), I am still lower than where I originally started. Going through caffeine withdrawal again is going to be the hardest part, but I have done it before and know I will survive!